Saturday, 31 December 2011

Fernando Torres-Flop of the Year

Fernando Torres-Flop of the Year
........and the award for biggest football flop of 2011 goes to....Fernando Torres!
Torres has to be the biggest football flop this year. The £50 million striker has just failed to prove himself in Chelsea colours! sad smiley
He has scored only 3 times in the league since his big-money move to Chelsea in January 2011! One word-FLOP!!  happy smileyWhat a waste of money!

laughing smiley

...yeah, you need a lot of prayer, dude! laughing smiley

Of Chelsea, AVB & Losing the plot

Of Chelsea, AVB &; Losing the plot
Chelsea lost again, at home today ( 1-3 vs Aston Villa)-picking up a miserly 3 points out of a possible 12! (in the last 4 matches) smiley in tears
Certainly, this is a mini-crisis as far as the club is concerned. The players have been major  disappointments and so many are 'past it'. The young Manager-Andre Villas- Boas (AVB) , although full of ideas, has been tactically naive in so many matches. Basically, the plot is lost! sad smiley
This sums up his position,which is becoming increasingly untenable day by day,:
'As one of Europe's new generation of technocratic coaches who have developed a language of their own, Villas-Boas describes his defensive strategy in terms of high blocks, medium blocks and low blocks, but the most pertinent question before this fixture was whether his head would soon be on the chopping block' - Matt Hughes, The Times  laughing smiley

J. Cole-Work Out

J. Cole-Work Out
Enjoy Jermaine Lamarr Cole's 'Work Out' -one of the songs from his hit debut album, Cole World: The Sideline Story
He has been nominated for Best New Artist at the 54th Grammy Awards to be held in February 2012 sunglasses smiley

Friday, 30 December 2011

The iphone 4 Siri that went gaga!

The iphone 4 Siri that went gaga!
A mum and her 12-year old lad got a 'rude awakening' when a test iphone 4S told the latter to shut the f**k up! 
I feel sorry for these two but  sometimes, some people just go on and on that you feel like tearing your hair out. You'd want to say " I like you a lot but it's just that, at this moment, I prefer quiet more! laughing smiley
Maybe you could just give them this device to shut them up! *evil grin* 

Thursday, 29 December 2011

Perception- a b*tch!

Perception- a b*tch!
It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see! laughing smiley

That Robin Van Persie's wonder goal

That Robin Van Persie's wonder goal
Setting- Charlton Athletic vs Arsenal (The Valley, (30/09/2006)
RVP met a cross ( from Eboue) with a delightful left foot volley into the top left corner of the Charlton goal. Top draw!, great goal!sunglasses smiley

Of Samoans, date skip, Tony Montana & China's gain

Of Samoans, date skip, America's loss & China's gain
So the Samoans are skipping  Friday, the 30th of December so as to synchronise their time with China's!shacking head in disbelief smiley
This is just the stuff of a Hollywood film! The Chinese are taking over the world! 
All money ain't good money. Try telling that to the Samoans! :)
Gives meaning to Tony Montana's (Al Pacino) quote in the movie, Scarface: First you get the money, then you get the power, then you get the women . In China's case: you get the Samoans too! :D
Try explaining this isht to a Samoan 5-year old whose birthday party falls on the affected date :)

Why the film 'Pretty Woman' is a lie!

Why the film 'Pretty Woman' is a lie!
You all remember the scenario in the film, don't you? Suave gentleman meets hooker, takes hooker home.
Both catch feelings and live happily ever after.
This type of ish is what Hollywood is built on. It's the kind of fairy tale that makes Disneyland tick. But in real life, if you take a hooker home, 9 out of 10 times, she's going to miss with your stuff by the morning!! :)

Wednesday, 28 December 2011

Thierry Henry-Wonder goals

Thierry Henry-Wonder goals
Enjoy two of Thierry Henry's great goals in an Arsenal Shirt
1. That popular goal vs Manchester United (at Highbury October 2000)
 While holding off his marker, Henry flicked the ball up, turned and volleyed an exquisite dipping shot over goalkeeper Fabian Barthez in one fluid movement. The ball nested in the top corner of United's goal. Genius! sunglasses smiley

2. .....and the less popular(but equally impressive effort) Scored against an unfamiliar side (? Wetz) pre-season 2006-2007
-incredible first touch, audacious flick over marker and perfect volley into the far corner of the goal. Such composure!, simply witchcraft! sunglasses smiley

Of Kim Jong iI's funeral, sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity

Of Kim Jong iI's funeral, sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity
Can't believe this exercise in mass hysteria!shacking head in disbelief smiley
The ridiculous show of grief by the North Koreans is just the stuff of comedy-in my opinion. I've never seen so many 'grown ups' cry in public at someone's funeral like that before. To think this was a guy who'd rather his people starve to death than stop spending his country's limited funds on it's large Army! sad smiley
Puts meaning to the line: ' kissing an a*s even after it had been sh*tting on you! :)
 Talk about sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity!!
Or is it a case of the rest of the world 'just not knowing' about these people?

Brawl at Jesus' Birthplace

Brawl at Jesus' Birthplace
People suck, we all need Jesus! *no pun intended*:D

Tuesday, 27 December 2011

That Dennis Bergkamp's goal against Newcastle-Audacious!

That Dennis Bergkamp's goal against Newcastle-Audacious!
Setting: English Premiership, Newcastle-0, Arsenal 2   2nd March 2002
Bergkamp collected a low pass from the left flank in the edge of the opponent area with his back to goal. Under pressure from his marker Nikos Dabizas, he controlled the ball with one flick, sent it around Dabizas on his right, while he turned facing the goal on Dabizas's left side. He met the ball behind the hapless defender and placed it precisely into the bottom right-hand corner of the goal to score.
A simply 'rude' ( from the defender's point of view) and audacious effort! :)  Great goal! B-)
Hear the late Sir Bobby Robson(Newcastle's coach at the time): ''You can't blame anyone for that. You just have to accept that Bergkamp did a good thing" :D

Scarface's Tony Montana-Balls of Steel!

Tony Montana-Balls of Steel! 
Scarface's Tony Montana (Al Pacino) has to be one of the few likable antiheroes in film history
Hear one of so many of his memorable quotes:
''Let's get something straight here, I never f*cked anybody over in my life who didn't have it coming. All I have in this world are my balls and my words, and I don't break it for no one . You understand?"
That piece of sh*t up there, I never liked him. I never trusted him. For all I know he had me set up and had my friend, Angel Fernandez, killed. But that's history. I'm here, he's not. You wanna go on with me, you say it. You don't, then you make your move'' This was Tony's response to his Bolivian cocaine kingpin host, Sosa,when his integrity was questioned. This was after witnessing the killing of his police informant accomplice by Sosa's henchmen!. Mere mortals would have cowered and stammered. Not Tony Montana. One word to describe this-Ballsy!sunglasses smiley

Ricardo Quaresma's wonder goal

 Ricardo Quarema's wonder goal
Setting: Euro 2008 qualifier, Portugal -4 vs Belgium-0 March 2007
He collected a pass from Cristiano Ronaldo on the right wing, dribbled a defender with a fancy right foot flick and,with the outside of the right foot,  the ball was buried in the far right corner of the Belgian goal via a looping shot-beating the goalie in the process. He had no right scoring a goal like that!, some aerodynamic laws must've been broken by the flight of the ball in the process! :D
Great goal!

Of Kobe, Vanessa Bryant, cheating and basic isht

Of Kobe, Vanessa Bryant, cheating and basic isht
So Vanessa is leaving Kobe (Mr 105) because of his cheating.

Show me a beautiful woman, and I’ll show you a man that’s tired of having sex with her.” It's obtuse, crass, tactless, but, by jove, it's the truth

 I'm not trying to make any excuses for cheating 'cos it's wrong!
I don't have the solutions because there's no point in applying simple arithmetric methods in solving complex algebra-Epic fail!
These help though:
Woman, know thy man- be the type of woman who can see the end of the story before it even begins and just skips it altogether. It's called having a potent bullsh*t detector! :D

Reinventing yourself (like makeover) and spicing your love life with your man won't hurt either :)

Man, you've got to do better. You got money, talent and fame so you think you're in control. Right?
Wrong, Ninja!

If you think of it in airplane terms, power and talent are the Airbuses of sexual temptation. There’s just something about someone who’s good at what they do love smiley
 Lust is powerful too, few men of sound mind would turn down a casual sex situationdrooling smiley

 It's all about avoiding this situation in the first place. Because if you combine male sexual frailty with abundant opportunity it's hard to imagine that a man won't cheat! :)
Just because you can do 'it' doesn't mean you should smiley

Monday, 26 December 2011

Of derriere, Michelle O, Sensenbrenner, Rih Rih and Sista Love

Of derriereMichelle O., SensenbrennerRih RihSista love and Viral power
So Rep. Jim Sensenbrenner from Wisconsin reportedly passed a side comment about Michelle Obama which goes thus: "she lectures us on eating right while she has a large posterior herself''' T'was a crass, illogical, insensitive, tactless, putting -the -foot- in- the -mouth comment wagging finger smiley
So Jackie (Dutch magazine) had this to say about Rihanna: ''She has street cred, she has a ghetto ass and she has a golden throat. Rihanna, the good girl gone bad, is the ultimate niggabitchsmiley  and displays that gladly, and for her that means: what’s on can come off. If that means she’ll be on stage half naked, then so be it.” One word-Outrageous!
In 2011, with a black Commander- in- Chief of the most powerful country in the world, you'd like to think that we've moved from racism(and sexism). Obviously not!  It's a sad day in Mudville! 
Fortunately both types of ill behaviour were exposed quickly due to viral power
Jim ( no sense)Sensenbrenner sent a personal apology to the First Lady and Jackie 'Editor- in-Chief, Eva Hoeke apologised and resigned. However, the magazine has still not got it 
It is a fact that people are fascinated with the black female body even though they criticise it in public (I've got first hand experience from this blog! The Eye Candy section is the most popular- with Ninjas from countries as diverse as Saudi Arabia, Israel, Burma and Burkina Faso-visiting to ogle the black female body silently! :-D )  So people like Sensenbrenner and the bigoted folks at Jackie can miss me with their bullsh*t!tongue smiley
By the way Sensenbrenner won't know a big booty if one hits him in the face :-D
For the Ninjas who appreciate a sista's body, in the words of Liverpool fans, you'll never walk alone! joke smiley

Michelle O. Big booty? No way! Just right 

Big booty, YES! :-D

Sista!!! kiss smiley