Saturday, 27 February 2016

WTF

WTF
video

Thursday, 4 February 2016

Me Before You -Trailer


Me Before You -Trailer
 Upcoming American romantic drama film based on the 2012 novel of the same name by Jojo Moyes. The film stars Emilia ClarkeSam Claflin


Jenna ColemanCharles Dance,Matthew LewisBen Lloyd-Hughes and Janet McTeer
It's scheduled to be released by Warner Bros. on June 3, 2016.
Lovely Trailer- check it out below





Kate Winslet( Rose, Titanic) : Jack could have lived

Kate Winslet( Rose, Titanic) : Jack could have lived
Check out Kate Winslet(Rose) on Jimmy Kimmel's show, confirming what some of us had always believed that : 
Leo ( Jack) could have actually fitted on that Titanic door raft - along with her- instead of freezing to death in the icy water. 
The comments below the article inspired the pics. Please scroll through them all....and enjoy! πŸ˜…πŸ˜‚
Kate on Jimmy Kimmel's show 3 days ago


Jack did try to get on, but the door raft toppled, threatening to tip Rose in, some did not risk it. 
So, whether he would fit may have been irrelevant




Basically - as a man - he had to die! *sighs*
(On the other hand, you have to question if that door would still have floated with two of them on top. Space is not the only issue.) 
Pix 2 shows ways in which they both could have shared that door raft 😏😟
Some think It doesn't matter that he would have fitted. That door would not have had enough buoyancy to stay up with both of them on it.
Pix 3- Wait! Was James Cameron in the water too? πŸ˜€πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜‡

Speaking to the Guardian’s Hadley Freeman (on the question of why Jack had to die) in 2012, Director James Cameron also cited another reason for Jack’s fate: dramatic expediency.
"Wait a minute,” he said, “I’m going to call up William Shakespeare and ask why Romeo and Juliet had to die.”

Err, James, ....
Why did Romeo and Juliet have to die? ( pix 2)
Because Romeo killed Tybalt ( pix 1 ) and was banished from Verona so Juliet faked her own death to be with him but the message didn't make it to Romeo who then killed himself out of grief after which Juliet woke up and found Romeo dead and then killed herself out of grief as well.
Why did Jack have to die?
Some door( raft! ) πŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ™„


Check out the spin in this explanation of why Jack had to die in the movie, Titanic πŸ˜ŽπŸ˜…

No, he has to die! - as Zizek explains:

"Is Cameron's Titanic really about the catastrophe of the ship hitting the ice-berg? One should be attentive to the precise moment of the catastrophe: it takes place when the two young lovers (Leonardo di Caprio and Kate Winslett), immediately after consummating their amorous link in the sexual act, return to the ship's deck. This, however, is not all: if this were all, then the catastrophe would have been simply the punishment of Fate for the double transgression (illegitimate sexual act; crossing the class divisions). 

What is more crucial is that, on the deck, Kate passionately says to her lover that, when the ship will reach New York the next morning, she will leave with him, preferring poor life with her true love to the false corrupted life among the rich; at THIS moment the ship hits the ice-berg, in order to PREVENT what would undoubtedly have been the TRUE catastrophe, namely the couple's life in New York - one can safely guess that soon, the misery of everyday life would destroy their love.

The catastrophe thus occurs in order to safe their love, in order to sustain the illusion that, if it were not to happen, they would have lived "happily forever after"...
But even this is not all; a further clue is provided by the final moments of di Caprio. He is freezing in the cold water, dying, while Winslet is safely floating on a large piece of wood; aware that she is losing him, she cries: "I'll never let you go!", and, while saying this, she pushes him away with her hands - why? 

Beneath the story of a love couple, Titanic tells another story, the story of a spoiled high-society girl in an identity-crisis: she is confused, doesn't know what to do with herself, and, much more than her love partner, di Caprio is a kind of "vanishing mediator" whose function is to restore her sense of identity and purpose in life, her self-image (quite literally, also: he draws her image); once his job is done, he can disappear. 

This is why his last words, before he disappears in freezing North Atlantic, are not the words of a departing lover's, but, rather, the last message of a preacher, telling her how to lead her life, to be honest and faithful to herself, etc. 
What this means is that Cameron's superficial Hollywood-Marxism (his all too obvious privileging of the lower classes and caricatural depiction of the cruel egotism and opportunism of the rich) should not deceive us: beneath this sympathy for the poor, there is another narrative, the profoundly reactionary myth, first fully deployed by Kipling's Captain Courageous, of a young rich person in crisis who gets his (or her) vitality restored by a brief intimate contact with the full-blooded life of the poor. What lurks behind the compassion for the poor is their vampiric exploitation."


Titanic survival by gender ...
Women
Total: 434
Died: 110
Survived: 324
% Survived: 75%
Men
Total: 1680
Died: 1357
Survived: 323
% Survived: 19%
So obviously a gender based policy in operation - for some reason they felt men were less worthy of life than women. Hundred years on, nothing new on that! πŸ˜‹
Interesting that in the days before Feminism it was a case of "Women and Children first!" into the lifeboats.
Today it would probably be a case of "Every person for themselves!"
Equality is a good thing.
Chivalry.Is.Dead!!πŸ˜‡πŸ˜‹πŸ™‚

Pix 1 ( Jack in first class) and Pix 2 ( Rose in belly of the ship, 3rd class) won't have happened in real life!: 
The whole story was bunk. The ship was heavily segregated and Jack would probably not have even been allowed on deck. He and Rose would never have met. The snobbery of the Yank toffs would never have allowed them to mix. He would never have been invited to dine. Complete bunk from beginning to end

One of the comments : "I travelled on the Empress of Canada in May 1970 and it was too flaming cold to stand on the prow of the ship in a filmy outfit. As for sneaking into first class, you'd have had to kill several stewards who were employed to keep us, the riff-raff, out of the rarified atmosphere of upper class. And we would have been kicked off the makeshift raft very speedily regardless of any hot relationship with an upper class twat! πŸ˜„πŸ˜Š"

Given their exposure to gallons of freezing water even before they went overboard ( remember when Rose had to go back to save a handcuffed Jack? ) , they both should have died.
In reality Rose would not have lasted very long before dying of hypothermia also. She had been drenched in freezing water and then lay exposed to the wind on that door. The combination of wet and wind is deadly

It wouldnt have ended happily ever after anyway, Rose would've gotten knocked up ( pix 1 ) and Jack would've gotten on the drink, before losing his labouring job. One day he'd have said he's going out to get milk and never would've come back ( he'd have ended up with his bevy of never-ending bimbos πŸ˜‚ pix 2 ) . Rose would've ended up a street walker ( pix 4) and her children ended up at a orphanage ( pix 3 ).
The Romeo/ Juliet real life analogy- 
There is a very good reason why Leo's character had to die or for that matter Romeo too. Because if they didn't then the couple would have to actually live together. Divorce would follow in a couple of years, after which Juliet would declare that she never really loved him; Romeo would confess that the sex stopped after 9 months and it had become tedium quite a bit before that; and that all Juliet ever wanted to do was sit on the couch and watch the jesters, while spending him money on her sisters and her mother, to him she had become indistinguishable from a sofa ornament.

Another comment : "It was a stupid movie. OK I was prepared to forgive, for reasons of dramatic license, them managing to get access to one another at all, or running through the engine rooms or accessing the cargo hold and having sex in a car... but really. The stupidest part of all, was Rose throwing the priceless jewel into the sea. 😑Absolutely ridiculous.
And not an ounce of remorse as Rose the elder throws the broach into the Atlantic, heartless old cow πŸ™‚
I hate that movieπŸ™„
One guesses that "Rose" lived her whole life like that - using men to get ahead, and disposing of them like a female preying mantis πŸ™„πŸ˜³

Apt response: it's a movie, you don't have to ruin it by trying to make it some sort of technically perfect reality. Laugh, cry, applaud or walk the hell out and let everyone else enjoy having their imaginations taken for a stroll
Movies are magic, let go and enjoy them to the fullest. A lot of people went to a lot of trouble to make you cry (or laugh), so you better respect that
Sit all the way up front so no one can see, and cry your eyes out! ( or laugh yourself to stupor - as the case may be)

There's a bit with tits that's quite good, other than that it's rubbish πŸ˜‚πŸ˜€

Titanic 2 : Jack is Back! 
Whatever you do, make sure you watch this fan-produced trailer of the sequel ( that never was! ) Absolutely brilliant! πŸ˜ŽπŸ˜ŽπŸ˜€



πŸ˜ƒπŸ™‚
Person A- All he had to do was stand up and get out of the pool! 

Person B- Time to shoot and release a 'Titanic: Alternate Ending' for the 20th anniversary.

Person C - What happened to the cameraman?
Person D- He got a posthumous OscarπŸ˜‚πŸ˜€πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜…
DiCaprio had to die. He was awful in the Titanic! πŸ™„
But in death, he was reborn as a fantastic actor.😎
It was a MOVIE, folks. πŸ˜€πŸ˜Š
They fished Leonardo DiCaprio out of the water, paid him handsomely for his work, and — as of last report — he's still alive, some 104 years later.πŸ˜€πŸ˜€
Then a bear raped him. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜ƒ ( The Revenant) 
For art. πŸ˜ƒ
Why bother saving him when he was only going to end up getting raped by a bear? 
Because he will get an Oscar for it.πŸ™‚



Violet Constance Jessop (2 October 1887 – 5 May 1971) was an ocean liner stewardess and nurse who achieved fame by surviving the disastrous sinkings of both the RMS Titanic and her sister ship, the HMHS Britannic, in 1912 and 1916 respectively. In addition, she had been on board the RMS Olympic, their other sister ship, when it collided with the protected cruiser HMS Hawke in 1911.
As you can see, she died at the ripe old age of 83
Water death? Not todayyy!!! πŸ˜…
Not the sort of person you'd want to get in a boat with then!!! πŸ˜‹πŸ˜€




















Monday, 1 February 2016

The Meek Mill-Drake beef continues



The Meek Mill-Drake beef continues


Origin- Meek accuses Drake of being inauthentic, of using a Ghost writer ( Quentin Miller) late last year
Drake responded with a diss song - Back to Back
Meek's response was weak
Social media felt that Drake had literally ended Meek's Rap career back then

Drake's 'Summer Sixteen' dropped at 7 pm yesterday ( it was a diss song directed at Meek, Kanye West....even Obama) link

Meek Mill's 'War pain' dropped at 7:20 pm ( 20 mins later!! ) link

This is where it gets really interesting!!
Meek references multiple lines from Summer Sixteen.
Eg Drake said "...“I used to wanna be on Rocafella then I turned into Jay”
Meek's responded in his song thus "And you claimin' you HOV now? Why you state that shit?" 

That meant that Meek either heard Drake’s song a while ago ( likely) or he magically put his verse together in a few minutes, mastered it, and released it in a 20 minutes span- while at a B/ball game with Nicki Minaj!! ( impossible)

Inference- Drake might really be a fraud!
How is it possible that Meek Mill mocks lines in a song Drake dropped 20 mins earlier? 
1. It appears that the dude Drake uses Ghostwriters for real

2. Meek probably know’s all of Drake's ghostwriters. 

( He definitely knew Quentin Miller)

3. He probably just paid whoever wrote 'Summer 16' for Drake more than Drake paid the guy to write the verse… Money Talks!!

4. The general consensus was that Meek Mill won this Round hands down!! Drake's credibility is on the line here. Nicki Minaj's boyfriend is literally back from the dead ( back from Rapper's graveyard )

Unlike Drake, Meek genuinely did start from the bottom. (Stop playin' nigga, we came from nothin'- was the last line in War Pain)

 I mean, how can you hate on a dude that came from this (see video) to one of the biggest stars in the game (Nicki Minaj)




Wednesday, 27 January 2016

Chelsea's Ramires joins Chinese Club



video

It's official: Ramires has joined Chinese Super League Club, Jiangsu Suning
His achievements & most memorable goals are in the pix & video above respectively
Thanks for the memories, 'Blue Kenyan'
All the best

Monday, 25 January 2016

The Japanese Vaginal Stick

The Japanese vaginal stick
This article fascinates me because:
1. of my OB-GYN background
2. of it's play with words

''....Inserting things into vaginas to make them “tighter” isn’t so unusual. The belief stems from a practice to “dry out” the vagina—which seems, uh, not fun? The theory goes that a dry, non-lubricated vagina results in painful penetration and spasms, which will “tighten the vaginal opening.”
In fact, according to a PLOS One study, women have inserted everything from herbs, bleach, and even pulverized rock in their vaginas.
All in an effort to obtain the holy grail of vaginas: the dry, sandy, vagina. Yikes!! 
gasp emoticon grin emotof vaginas: the dry, sandy, vagina. Yikes!! gasp emoticon
A vagina full of pulverized rock you say? It gives “dry-humping” a whole new meaning. smile emoticon
If you are really worried about a loose vagina, go for Kegel exercises instead:Kegel  
The conclusion:
“Vaginas should be wet and they should stretch. That’s part of what makes them fun. (spoken like an OB-GYN smile emoticon ) So please don’t get the Japanese vagina stick

Saturday, 21 February 2015

Perspectives 3- for the football Aficionado

Perspectives 3- for the football Aficionado

Serie A


Pirlo- rolled back the years once again yesterday with a 30-yard match-winning beauty against Atalanta

He is key to the Biaconeri's success in midweek, against Dortmund in the CL

Juventus were far from impressive in that match and they've shown a tendency to concede from set-pieces in recent times ( they did again yesterday, to allow Atalanta take the lead against the run of play) They are also susceptible during counter-attacks

So, expect Reus and Aubamayang to harrass and harry Pirlo and the CBs, Bonucci and Chiellini

Max Allegri's 4-3-1-2 formation means that Pirlo can easily be the source of their midfield/counter attack vulnerability. Pirlo can also look bad when he has no one to pass to. ( see photo 1)

This is why fans prefer Caceres and Padoin at FBs. They actually play like FBs rather than Lichtsteiner and Evra who think they’re WBs/wide mids and often play the positions too advanced. Not only does this shore up defense but it means the midfielders/Pirlo are not isolated with no one to pass to.

For this formation to be perfect against Dortmund, Pereyra has to play behind the strikers. That way, you get creative attacking width through him because he moves around up there and drifts wide

( to find out why Allegri ditched his predecessor, Conte's 3-5-2 and adopted 4-3-1-2 to accommodate the vital Pirlo, the tactical formation- inclined can check out this article)

Pogba and Tevez have to raise their games too ( they've been lukewarm recently ) and Moratta has to pair Tevez up front ( although Llorente scored ( a scrappy goal) yesterday, he looks like a poor fit up front- that has been the story of his season so far )

Bundesliga

Dortmund- it appears as if they have broken through that mental block! They are now 10th after their 3rd consecutive victory. To understand how well they are playing -particularly in attack- check out this Gundogan goal ( their second, in a 3-2 victory against Stuggart yesterday) it's a thing of beauty.

They are still vulnerable in defence though ( Sahin should have been sent off for preventing a clear goal-scoring opportunity. Dortmund conceded the first goal from the resultant penalty though), this is why their match against Juve in Turin, on Tuesday is difficult to call

Hear Gundogan expressing sympathy for the hapless Stuttgart : " we were bottom ourselves a couple of weeks ago. It's not a nice situation. The head is willing but the body doesn't respond" That has to be the quote of the week :D

Bayern

How do you solve a problem like Xabi

Bayern have been poor travellers of late.

It appears that if you target Xabi Alonso by man-marking him, combining a high press defence while simultaneously maintaining deep structured defensive lines, you neutralise their build-up play and render their attack flaccid ( it worked at Wolfsburg, Schalke and Shakhtar recently) Xabi got sent off in that Shaktar game too! :-(

He is not a very mobile player, hence his game is stifled with this approach and his good passing ability is limited to ineffective sideways and backward passes.

Or perhaps Schweinsteiger just cramps Alonso's style and both shouldn't be playing at the same time. Perhaps it is not a coincidence that Xabi ran the show for the first 3 months in Bayern, but since Schweini came back from injury, Xabi's performance has dipped.

La Liga

Barca

I'm not going to bore you with the news ( maybe I should) that Leo Messi is on course to break his 91 goals a season record set in 2012.

The signs look 'ominous' too!:

1. He has 5 more goals than he did at this stage back then ( 14 vs 9 )

2. He's working hard ( getting back earlier than others to training after a break)

3. CR7 winning his 3rd Ballon D'Or is enough motivation for the vertically-challenged one :-)

4. There is Copa America this summer ( he didn't have this 'luxury' to add to his tally in that record-breaking year!! )

The search for Xavi's replacement

Rakitic has done well, but he's no Xavi. Oliver Torres might be a perfect fit. He is like a Xavi incarnate. Check out this article for more



Real Madrid

It was a solid yet oddly uncomfortable win for Real in midweek ( vs Schalke )

It's a step in the right direction though following their recent slump. The real buzz after that game was Lucas Silva's performance in the middle. The young lad was solid -considering this was his first full game. There are already talks that he is an upgrade to Khedira and Illaramendi. Time will tell

EPL

Arsenal-

For Wilshere to return, Ramsey had to be injured. The two cannot simultaneously play in the centre of midfield. It's Murphy's Law of Averages regarding Injuries in Arsenal's Midfield. :-)

If he plays, ( very likely) will he be disciplined enough to smartly choose his moments to join the attack, and to protect Coquelin in the pivot? This is the big question in Wenger's recent romance with the counter-attacking 4-1-4-1 formation. We might find out soon, starting with Crystal Palace today

Man Utd

LVG's men aren't very good, but at least they're annoying people again.

Why?

It's called the Hot Piss Paradox:

The knowledge that your team and, by extension, you have gotten away with it, and everybody is really annoyed with that. It is what Man Utd has been doing all season- the play ain't sh*t but they keep getting decent results.

Why Hot Piss Paradox? 'Cos rolling around in hot piss is literally a terrible idea, but metaphorically great fun, it seems! Ask a tantrum-throwing kid :D

We'll see if this streak continues at Swansea. Both Phil a Jones and RVP are available after short injury lay offs

Man City

Much of the talk is whether Bony will make his City debut vs Newcastle this weekend. Toure should start though and I suspect Pellegrini will keep Bony on the subs bench and start with the same line up that will face Barca in midweek- with Silva playing just behind Aguero in a 4-4-1-1 modification of the traditional 4-4-2 set up

Liverpool

Mario Balotelli tweeted about "Penalty-gate" : "Thank you hendo for let me take the penalty. Stop drama now." Apart from the slight grammar challenge, that seems like some pretty good advice. Let’s stop the drama. Now! :D

Chelsea

We are in a unique and enviable position ( and I'm not talking about the all season- long OATT status :P ) when it comes to goalkeepers. Check out this article for what we think about the Courtois/Cech situation

Scottish Championship

Stan Collymore has been fired from his job as a BT Pundit

It follows his demand that Rangers’ games should not be televised because of sectarian singing by their fans, citing references in songs to "Fenian blood".

(These are "Billy Boys" songs- composed in the 1930s

"Billy Boys" were a Protestant street gang in Glasgow led by Billy Fullerton in the 1920s

Rangers fans adopted their songs when this gang started attending games)

Collymore wrote a series of tweets about the matter. One said: "I can hold my head high and say I did the right thing to challenge hypocrisy amongst Rangers fans"



These songs were eventually banned by the Scottish Govt & the SFA in 2011 'cos of the "Up to our knees in Fenian blood" line in it

Fenian- the Fenian Brotherhood is a fraternal organisation dedicated to the establishment of an independent Irish Republic in the 19th and early 20th century.

These are Catholics. Rangers and its fans are Protestants. I hope you get the vibes now

Collymore chose the wrong medium ( Twitter) in my opinion and BT were within their rights to fire him. Why Twitter? What's the point?

Finally, a word on racism in football:

Andi Thomas makes a lot of sense in this article



"Football in general, and football fans in particular, can't persuade a racist not to be a racist. And a sport, and the people who follow that sport, cannot dismantle a system of discrimination and oppression that has existed for centuries and continues to exist, even though it's no longer acceptable to stand on the terraces and lob darts at the nearest black head. What football and football fans can do, however, is work together to make the game as safe a space as possible for everybody, at the same time as wider society works towards the same ends"

This is the kind of discussion I want to be having on these issues- Racism & Sectarianism- not the ( in my opinion) "your club has more racists than mine" mindless, waste of brain function psychobabble that sometimes happen in some fora

It is what it is